In my school there is a depressed boy. He is 17, obese, smells terribly, and has some sort of speech impediment. I do indeed feel sorry for him, but I seldom speak to him as he is not a nice person really. A couple of years ago he wrote a poem to a girl whom he liked. It involved membral palpitations amongst other doings. He even now follows the same girl and her friends. They have attempted to be polite but could not stand him. So when they told him to truck off and die, he followed their counsel.
Well, he could do something with his weight, but he whilst I eat my wholemeal bread drink my milk and flare my anterior deltoids about da place, devours but soft drinks chocolates and a sort of crisp packet that contains double the amount of a standard bag around these parts (Walkers MAX). A girl who used to be as huge underwent a remarkable transformation over the past year, she must have lost about 50lbs. If she can do it then so can he. If I can go from the smallest little latinist 9 months ago 110lbs to 150 SHREDDED then he can lose the same amount with far less effort I should imagine. He expects people to like him when he does nothing but feel sorry for himself and stalk girls and invite himself to places. I believe generally that he is a weak person. There are plenty of those but relatively few are so lacking in qualities that depression may come about.
There is a bridge outside the school, with a motorway underneath it. This boy tried to kill himself by rolling down a hill. Then he tried strangling himself with his tie but his tie broke. Then he probably rolled down a hill again. He came back to school with grass all over and the girls who told him to die were all concerned now. Ooh yes. I can’t believe it we must make a statement he tried to KILL himself. I was rolling around on the floor saying look I am Mike! Their eyes all flared at me disgusted and my lats all flared at them shredded so they looked back down submerged in episcopal humility. At least I did not pretend to be his friend at any time, which they did for odd reasons, and then tell him to die 
In lessons dem teachers be like “ooh and to think, I was moaning at him for late homework, so unimportant…”
It’s hard to know what to do in such a case. You want to help but you don’t want to be fake. So instead we just roll on the floor and laugh.
Anyway, today I had a 3 hour chemistry lesson as a practical exam. It was harsh as no one had any clue; one girl did not know what to do, asked the legendary teacher for help and he said ‘no. That is against regulations. Look in a book’. She was there for an hour trying so hard. He just kept shoving books in her face which she did not understand. She turned around to me and said ‘you are swole can’t you military press him into a Bucher funnel and force him to help me?’ So I provisoirement paused my titration, gripped das pipette, plunged it into my abdomen smashing it to pieces right in front of her face. She inadvertently performed a subvestimental titration of herself as I endeavoured to inform her of des appropriate dilutions of her acid. I lowered my shades, gave her a pectoral dance, picked up pen and taught her stoichiometry.
Seriously though she was upset crying, and even after I taught her and due to her little accident (my fault I here concede) she said that she had to leave. As she ran to the door in tears the teacher ran after her still waving books in her face: “Any fool can titrate! Look look in this book! Titrations! You can research titrations here see the mole ratio and neutralisation reactions! Look look this bo-” [door slam]
Another girl was shouting at him for he would not tell her the colour of screened methyl orange when pH7. She looked in all textbook and could not find it he still would not tell here which amused me greatly. Usually teachers allow you basically to cheat in practical exams but not this one! It is a shock for us retarded valleys kids for we are not accustomed to thinking and working alone! As you can see only 2/15 kids could handle das Pressure.
After this I had to skip German I had endured enough for the day 
mine is full of nerds and junior-junkies
Bear in mind that I get paid for all this. I use it to buy proteins and dextrose polymers.