She

This board is a composition workshop, like a writers' workshop: post your work with questions about style or vocabulary, comment on other people's work, post composition challenges on some topic or form, or just dazzle us with your inventive use of galliambics.
Callisper
Textkit Member
Posts: 146
Joined: Mon Jan 28, 2019 8:21 pm

Re: She

Post by Callisper »

mwh wrote: Wed Feb 20, 2019 11:29 pm Callisper, Sorry, I missed your post. Thanks for querying posset. possit would have been better, wouldn’t it? (That may be what I meant to write.)
I think it certainly would be better, but I would go for perfect potential subjunctive potuerit (since last time you castigated me for referring to Pinkster, maybe Woodcock will be less objectionable: see section 120) or (best IMO) just potuit (Woodcock section 125).
mwh wrote: Wed Feb 20, 2019 11:29 pmBut I suppose we should really be in oratio obliqua for this bit, e.g. Illam fort. posse putabam. That conveniently dodges the question of both tense and mood :D (unless you’d prefer periphrastic future, rather cumbersome).
At any rate it's obvious that the structure of this Latin so far is not very Latinate.

Callisper
Textkit Member
Posts: 146
Joined: Mon Jan 28, 2019 8:21 pm

Re: She

Post by Callisper »

bedwere wrote: Wed Feb 20, 2019 10:05 pm I like comic books. That's how I learned to read as a child. So they are, at least for me, a great pedagogical tool. When I was in high school,. I liked to translate from Italian to Latin. Now this exercise helps me remember the grammar and improve my knowledge of phraseology. I chose this book because it is in the public domain, has good graphics, and the story (so archetypal!) is very engaging.
I see. I do think (cf my reply to mwh above - I think a good example is "I could not help him. She might.") that there are parts where the structure of the English lends itself so poorly to retention in Latin that perhaps you take on a harder task, trying to conserve said structure, than you would have on your hands if you translated an English writer of fluid connected prose e.g. Samuel Johnson. For sure it would be easier to just allow yourself to use phrasing that would come more naturally in Latin. I highly recommend you go sentence-by-sentence and not be afraid to join clauses and sentences, or alter time-references, and generally add things in, which are absent from the English. (mwh's attempt w/ "putabam" was a start to doing this.)A lot of the time this will actually make things easier.
bedwere wrote: Wed Feb 20, 2019 10:05 pm I do recommend you read the real thing, the book, which has Greek composition (and Latin translation) within!
Thanks. The book's been on my reading list for a while now! As for the Greek composition etc in it, could you give me page references? Looks like you maybe tried to link me to particular pages of the book but Google won't give me a preview.

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Callisper wrote: Sat Feb 23, 2019 6:30 pm
bedwere wrote: Wed Feb 20, 2019 10:05 pm I do recommend you read the real thing, the book, which has Greek composition (and Latin translation) within!
Thanks. The book's been on my reading list for a while now! As for the Greek composition etc in it, could you give me page references? Looks like you maybe tried to link me to particular pages of the book but Google won't give me a preview.
I linked to pag. 33 and 42. Strange that it doesn't work for you, Cheers!

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 32


It is Ustane whom Leo loves!

How dare you common woman!

She with the wisdom of two thousand years of life still suffered the pangs of jealousy…


Est Statia amasia Leonis!

Qui audes, o plebeia!

Illa autem, etsi per duo millia annorum sapientiam docta, adhuc zelotypiam patiebatur.

Ἔστι Στατὴ ἐρωμένη Λέοντος.

Πῶς δὴ τολμᾷς, ὦ δημοτικὴ σύ;

Ἐκείνη δέ, καίπερ διὰ δισχιλίων ἐτῶν σεσοφισμένη, ἔτι ἔπασχε ζηλοτυπίαν.

I have waited twenty centuries for Kallikrates to return from the land of the dead. Now he is mine!

You shall not have him!


Duo milia annorum expecto reditum Callicratis ex Orco. Jam vir meus est!

Non habebis eum!

Δισχίλια ἔτη ἀναμένω τὴν ἐπάνοδον Καλλικράτους ἐκ τοῦ ᾍδου. Ἤδη οὑμὸς ἀνήρ ἐστιν.

Οὐ μὴ ἕξεις αὐτόν.

Fool! I warned you!

She had the power of some mysterious force, Ustane fell as if hit by lightning.

Look at her hair!


O fatua, nonne jamdudum dicebam?

Illa quidem potentia arcana quadam utebatur, Statia autem stupefacta cecidit.

Respice in comam!

Ὦ μῶρε σύ, οὐκ ἔλεγον ἐγὼ πάλαι;

Ἐκείνη μὲν δυνάμει μυστικῇ τινι ἐχρᾶτο, Στατὴ δ' ἐμβροντηθεῖσα ἔπεσεν.

Βλέψον εἰς τὴν κόμην.

When Kallikrates awakens in the morning, he will have no memory of Ustane. The drug in the goblet will wipe the past from his mind. He will know and love only She who can give him the gift of life for ever!

Callicrates, cum mane experrectus erit, nihil Statiæ in memoria habebit. Nam medicamentum in poculo præterita ex animo ejus delebit. Itaque agnitam amabit Illam solam quæ ei donum vitæ æternæ dare potest.

Καλλικράτης, ὅταν πρωῒ ἐγερθῇ, οὐχ ἕξει οὐδεμίαν Στατῆς μνήμην. Τὸ γὰρ ἐν τῷ ποτηρίῳ φάρμακον ἐξαλείψει τὰ πρόσθεν ἐκ τοῦ νοῦ αὐτοῦ. Ὥστε ἀναγνὼν ἐρασθήσεται Ἐκείνης μόνης τῆς δυναμένης τὸ δῶρον ζωῆς αἰωνίου δοῦναι αὐτῷ.

Prepare to journey. We leave tonight for the mountain palace of Kor.

This evil queen is mad! I must pretend to play along with her and hope that in some way I can save Leo!

Iter para. Proficiscemur enim hac nocte ad regiam montanam Cori.

Insanit ista scelesta regina. At opus est me nugantem sperare quodammodo fore ut Leonem salvum facias.

Συσκευάζου τὴν πορείαν. Ἐξορμησόμεθα γὰρ ταύτῃ τῇ νυκτὶ πρὸς τὰ ἐν τῷ ὄρει βασίλεια Κόρου.

Μαίνεται μὲν αὕτη ἡ πονηρὰ βασίλισσα. Δεῖ δέ με φλυαροῦντα ἐλπίζειν πως σώσειν Λέοντα.

ImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 33
Image 34

The next morning, the mountain of Kor, the palace of She-who-must-be-obey, 30,000 feet of sheer rock! The home of the murderess of Kallikrates, She who had found the secret of life for ever!

Postridie mane, ecce mons Cori, regia Illius cui obœdire oportet, saxum in pedum triginta miliorum altitudinem abruptum, domusque homicidæ Callicratis, sive Illius quæ secretum vitæ æternæ invenerat.

Πρωῒ δὲ τῇ ὑστεραίᾳ, ἰδοὺ τὸ ὄρος Κόρου, βασίλεια Ἐκείνης ᾗ δεῖ πειθαρχεῖν, πέτρα εἰς ποδῶν τρισμυρίων ὕψος ἀπορρώξ, οἶκός τε τῆς φονευτρίας Καλλικράτους, ἤτοι Ἐκείνης τῆς εὑρηκυίας τὸ ἀπόρρητον ζωῆς αἰωνίου.

Prepare the royal chambers. I bring guests to Kor!

I was anxious for Leo. He seemed better, but remained in a deep sleep.


Præparate regiam. Mecum enim fero hospites in Corum.

Ego sollicitabar de Leone. Ipse autem etsi convalescere videbatur adhuc arte dormiebat.

Παρασκευάζετε τὰ βασίλεια. Φέρομαι γὰρ ξένους εἰς Κόρον.

Ἐγὼ μὲν ἐφρόντιζον περὶ Λέοντος. Αὐτὸς δὲ φαινόμενός γε ῥαΐζειν ἔτι βαθὺν ἐκοιμᾶτο.

Leo and I were separated. I didn’t like the idea.

Take him to the throne room.


Deinde ego et Leo disjuncti sumus, et hoc mihi displicuit.

Fer eum in aulam.

Ἔπειτα ἐγὼ καὶ Λέων διεχωρίσθημεν, καὶ ἀπήρεσε τοῦτό μοι.

Ἔνεγκε αὐτὸν εἰς τὴν αὐλήν.

She is very skillful with medicine. All her people were. Look at these mummies. They look more alive than living people.

Illa præstantissima est in medicina. Omnis populus ejus erat. Vide cadavera arte medicata, quæ videntur magis vivere quam homines viventes.

Ἐκείνη ἐστὶ κρατίστη ἐν ἰατρικῇ. Πᾶς λαὸς αὐτῆς ἦν. Ἴδε νεκροὺς τοὺς τεταριχευμένους, οἳ φαίνονται μᾶλλον ζῆν ἢ ἄνθρωποι ζῶντες.

I wish Leo to live. There are enough dead people in the world! I am going to the throne room!


Precor Leonem vivere. Sat enim cadavera sunt in mundo! Ideo ibo in aulam.

Εὔχομαι Λέοντα ζῆν. Ἱκανοὶ γὰρ νεκροί εἰσιν ἐπὶ τῆς γῆς. Διὸ εἶμι εἰς τὴν αὐλήν.

ImageImageImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 35
Image 36

To enter will mean death!

You forget she is a queen! If you really wish to keep an eye on your friend, come with me!


Si quis introierit morietur!

Oblivisceris Illam reginam esse. Si vero vis amicum tuum ante oculos habere, sequere me.

Ἐάν τις εἰσέλθῃ θανεῖται.

Ἐπιλανθάνει Ἐκείνης βασιλίσσης οὔσης. Εἰ δὴ βούλει φίλον σὸν ἐν ὀφθαλμοῖς ἔχειν, ἀκολούθει μετ' ἐμου.

A small chamber adjacent to the throne room.

See for yourself, but safely!

She had placed Leo on an altar!


Erat quidem cella subjecta aulæ.

Ipse specta, at tute.

Illa autem Leonem super aram posuerat.

Ἦν μὲν οἰκίσκος ἐπικείμενος τῇ αὐλῇ.

Αὐτὸς θεῶ, ἀκινδύνως δέ.

Ἐκείνη δ' ἐτεθήκη Λέοντα ἐπὶ βωμοῦ.

You will get well, my Kallikrates! I will dance the sacred rite of the gods of Kor! It will please the gods and they will make you well again.

Convalesces, o Callicratisce! Tripudiabo enim sacros ritus deorum Cori. Quod vero placabit deis, qui autem medebuntur tibi.

Ῥαΐσεις, ὦ Καλλικρατίδιον. Χορεύσω γὰρ τοὺς ἱεροὺς θεσμοὺς τῶν θεῶν Κόρου. Τοῦτο μὲν ἀρέσει τοῖς θεοῖς, οἱ δὲ ἰάσονταί σε.

Watch! She will perform an ancient Egyptian dance, invoking the blessings of the gods of Kor. if she dances well and the gods are pleased, then the gods will heal your friend and make him well again!

Specta! Illa, deis Cori in auxilium invocatis, tripudium antiquorum Ægyptiorum saltabit. Si Illa bene saltaverit et deis placaverit, dei amico tuo medebuntur.

Θεῶ. Ἐκείνη, ἐπικαλέσασα θεοὺς Κόρου εἰς βοήθειαν, χορεύσει χορὸν παλαιῶν Αἰγυπτίων. Ἐὰν Ἐκείνη εὖ χορεύσῃ καὶ θεοῖς ἀρέσῃ, θεοὶ ἰάσονται φίλον σόν.

Come! She danced well! The gods will be pleased. Let us now, with the queen’s permission enter the throne room.

Age, bene saltavit. Deis placaverit. Reginæ concessu, ingrediamur nunc aulam.

Ἄγε, εὖ ἐχόρευσε. Θεοῖς ἀρεσαι ἄν. Συγχωρούσης βασιλίσσης, εἰσέλθωμεν νῦν αὐλήν.
ImageImageImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 37


The dance had ended. We were admitted.

Tunc, tripudio finito, admissi sumus.

Τότε μέν, τοῦ χόρου τέλος λαβόντος, εἰάθημεν εἰσελθεῖν.

Leo had recovered. But he was helpless against the queen.
The drugged potion She had given him and the supernatural spell of the magic cast by her dance for the gods of Kor, these things seemed to have affected Leo’s mind. His willpower was gone. Leo was a love-victim of the terrible She!


Leo autem quamvis convaluisset, inops erat coram regina. Medicamentum enim quod Illa dedit ei carmenque quod incantavit tripudians deis Cori, ipsa videbantur mentem Leonis infirmam reddidisse. Sic enim voluntas ejus evanuit, ut Leo amore Illius terribilis devictus sit.

Ὁ δὲ Λέων καίπερ πάλιν ῥαΐσας ἀμήχανος ἦν ἐναντίον τῆς βασιλίσσης. Τό τε γὰρ φάρμακον ὃ Ἐκείνη ἔδωκεν αὐτῷ καὶ ἡ ἐπῳδὴ ἣν ἐπῇσεν χορεύουσα τοῖς θεοῖς Κόρου, αὐτὰ ἐδόκει τὴν Λέοντος ψυχὴν ἀσθενῆ ποιῆσαι. Οὕτω γὰρ ἡ βούλησις αὐτοῦ ἠφανίσθη, ὥστε Λέων ἡσσήθη ἔρωτι Ἐκείνης τῆς δεινῆς.

He remembers nothing of the past.

I love you, my queen.


Non meminit præteritorum.

Te amo, o regina mea!

Οὐ μέμνηται τοῦ παρελθόντος χρόνου.

Σοῦ ἐρῶ, ὦ βασίλισσά μου.

What a twist of fate! She was the woman who had ruined Leo’s family, indirectly brought about the death of his father. Now Leo Vincey was like a slave to She!

My only wish is to spend my life with She.


Qualis fortuna! Illa enim erat quæ familiam Leonis perdiderat et quodammodo perfecerat ut pater ejus moriretur. Nunc autem Leo Vinciæus Illi inserviebat.

Tantummodo cupio vivere cum Illa.

Ὦ ποῖα τύχη. Ἐκείνη μὲν γὰρ ἦν ἡ ἀπολωλεκυῖα τὸν οἶκον Λέοντος καὶ ἄλλῃ γέ πῃ ἡ πεποιηκυῖα ὥστε τὸν πατέρα αὐτοῦ ἀποθανεῖν. Νῦν δὲ Λέων Οὐιγκιαῖος ἐδούλευεν Ἐκείνῃ.

Μόνον ἐπιθυμῶ ζῆν σὺν Ἐκείνῃ.

I will give you a life that lasts forever! You and I will bathe in the pillar of flame! The pillar of flame that gives life for ever.

To the pillar of flame! We leave within the hour!


Dabo tibi vitam æternam! Ego et tu lavabimur in columna ardenti! In columna ardenti quæ dat vitam æternam!

Ad columnam ardentem! Intra horam proficiscimur!

Δώσω σοι ζωὴν αἰώνιον. Ἐγὼ καὶ σὺ λουσόμεθα ἐν τῇ φλεγομένῃ κίονι. Ἐν τῇ φλεγομένῃ κίονι, τῇ ζωὴν αἰώνιον διδούσῃ.

Πρὸς τὴν φλεγομένην κίονα. Ἐντὸς τῆς ὥρας πορευόμεθα.
ImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 38

The mountain of Kor was hollow in the center. A great plain stretched almost as far as the eye could see. At the far rim, a mountain peak reared its lofty head. That distant pile of grim rock was our destination.

Medius mons Cori erat cavus. Planities enim magna extendebatur fere quatenus visus perveniebat. In extremo, excelsi cacumen montis exsurgebat. Et ad ipsum longinquum horridumque saxum nobis perveniendum erat.

Μέσον δὲ τὸ ὄρος Κόρου κοῖλον ἦν. Πεδίον γὰρ μέγα ἔτεινεν ἐφ' ὅσον οὐχ ἡ ὄψις ἀφικνεῖτο. Ἐν δὲ τῷ ἐσχάτῳ, ἡ ὄρους κορυφὴ ὑψηλοῦ ἀνίστατο. Καὶ πρὸς αὐτὴν τὴν μακράν τε καὶ τραχεῖαν πέτραν ἔδει ἡμᾶς ἀφικνεῖσθαι.

By afternoon we were ready for the climb.

Make haste, the climb is long!


Pomeridiano autem parati eramus ascendere.

Festinate, quia longa est ascensio.

Δείλῃ δ' ἑτοίμως εἴχομεν ἀναβαίνειν.

Σπεύδετε, ὅτι μακρὰ ἡ ἀνάβασις.

Upward we climbed for almost four hours. The plain was lost beneath the clouds.

The difficult part of the journey begins.


Et ascendimus fere quattuor horas. Planities autem abscondita sub nubibus erat.

Incipit pars ardua itineris.

Καὶ ἀνέβημεν σχεδὸν τέσσαρας ὥρας. Τὸ δὲ πεδίον ἦν ὑπὸ ταῖς νεφέλαις ἀποκεκρυμμένον.

Ἄρχεται τὸ ὄρθιον μέρος τῆς πορείας.

Be not afraid!

My nerve almost failed me at what I saw.

Follow me!


Nolite timere.

Cum vidissem modo animum non despondi.

Sequimini me!

Μὴ φοβεῖσθε.

Ἰδὼν δ' ὅσον οὐκ ἠθύμησα.

Ἀκολουθεῖτέ μοι.

ImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 39
Image 40

The chasm of Kor

Caution! The round rock rolls in the wind!

She walked across with a smile on her lips.


Ecce, hiatus Cori!

Cavete! Quia saxum rotundum vento volutat!

Illa ridens transivit.

Ἰδού, τὸ χάσμα Κόρου.

Εὐλαβεῖσθε. Ὅτι ὁ στρογγύλος πέτρος ἀνέμῳ κυλίει.

Ἐκείνη μὲν γελῶσα διέβη.

Leo made it and gave me a hand across.

Mahomed fell! The plank went with him! How would we return across the chasm?


Ayee!

Leo autem, eo perfecto, manum mihi protendit ut transirem.

Mahometus autem cecidit una cum tabula! Quomodo trans hiatum redituri essemus?

A!

Λέων δὲ τοῦτο διαπράξας προύτεινε τὴν χεῖρά μοι τοῦ διαβῆναι.

Μουχαμέτης δ' ἔπεσεν αὐτῇ τῇ σανίδι. Πῶς ἐπάνιμεν πέρα τοῦ χάσματος;

Ἆ.

ImageImageImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 41
Image 42

The pillar of flame that gives life for ever!

She removed her clothes.

I will bathe my body in the flames!


Ecce columna ardens quæ dat vitam æternam!

Illa ergo se vestimentis exuit.

Lavabo corpus in flammis!

Ἰδοὺ ἡ φλεγομένη κίων, ἡ ζωὴν αἰώνιον διδοῦσα.

Ἐκείνη οὖν ἐξεδύσατο τὰ ἵματια.

Λοούσομαι τὸ σῶμα ἐν ταῖς φλοξίν.

Kallikrates, there is nothing to fear!

The flame roared and crackled about the beautiful queen as though she were the very spirit of the flame!


Non est quod timeas, o Callicrates!

Vere profecto flammæ circa pulchram reginam rugientes crepitabant tamquam esset Illa ipsum flammæ numen!

Οὐδεὶς φόβος, ὦ Καλλίκρατες.

Καὶ μὴν αἱ περὶ τὴς καλῆς βασιλίσσης φλόγες βρυχώμεναι ἐψόφουν ὥσπερ εἰ ἦν Ἐκείνη αὐτὸ τὸ τῆς φλογὸς θεῖον.
ImageImageImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 43


She emerged more radiant and beautiful than any woman I ever hope to see!

I go next into the flame, my queen!

Something’s wrong!

Deinde illa emersit clarior pulchriorque quavis quam spero me umquam visurum!

Sequens ego ibo in flamma, o regina mea!

Res male se habet!

Εἶτα Ἐκείνη ἀνεδύσατο λαμπροτέρα τε καὶ καλλίων τῆς τυχούσης ἥντινά γε ἐλπίζω ποτὲ ὄψεσθαι.

Ἑπόμενος ἐγὼ εἶμι εἰς τὴν φλόγα, ὦ βασίλισσά μου.

Τὸ πρᾶγμα κακῶς ἔχει.

May the gods save me!

She was growing older before our eyes!

What foul revenge is this?


Salvam me faciant dii!

Illa vero senescebat ante oculos nostros!

Qualis ultio est ista?

Σώσειέν με οἱ θεοί.

Ἐκείνη δὴ ἐγήρασκεν ἐν ὀφθαλμοῖς ἡμῶν.

Ποῖα τιμωρία ἐστὶν αὕτη;
ImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 44


She shriveled and shrank before our very eyes!

I am lost! I die!


Illaque ante ipsos oculos nostros corrugabatur et contrahebatur!

Pereo! Morior!

Καὶ Ἐκείνη ῥυτιδουμένη συνῃρεῖτο ἐν αὐτοῖς ὀφθαλμοῖς ἡμῶν.

Ἀπόλλυμαι. Ἀποθνῄσκω.

She is dead!

You have avenged your family, but the taste of vengeance is always bitter!


Mortua est!

Tu quidem familiam vindicasti, ultio autem semper amara est!

Ἀποτέθνηκεν.

Σύγε μὲν ἐκδεδίκηκας τὸν οἶκον, ἡ δὲ τιμωρία ἀεὶ πικρά ἐστιν.

Life is not worth living without She! I will die in the flame!

Are you mad?


Non est operæ pretium vivere sine Illa! Moriar in flamma!

Num furis?

Ἄξιον οὐκ ἔστι βιοῦν ἄνευ Ἐκείνης. Ἀποθανοῦμαι ἐν τῇ φλογί.

Ἆρα μὴ μαίνει;
ImageImage

Callisper
Textkit Member
Posts: 146
Joined: Mon Jan 28, 2019 8:21 pm

Re: She

Post by Callisper »

Just looked back in this thread. Where do you get some of these phrases? You can't throw around idioms like "operae pretium" without understanding how they're actually used. This use of that idiom is particularly off. The Greek translation of that line is no better.

There are numerous other things I'd take issue with but maybe such things don't matter much in the face of your approach to this exercise. It is unclear whether you are trying to improve, or just want practice (which are two different things).
bedwere wrote: Fri Apr 12, 2019 4:27 pm Life is not worth living without She! I will die in the flame!

Are you mad?


Non est operæ pretium vivere sine Illa! Moriar in flamma!

Num furis?

Ἄξιον οὐκ ἔστι βιοῦν ἄνευ Ἐκείνης. Ἀποθανοῦμαι ἐν τῇ φλογί.

Ἆρα μὴ μαίνει;

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

In Smith and Hall. If you have suggestions for improvement, I'll consider them.

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 45


With She dead, her supernatural hold over Leo’s mind was gone. The spell was broken. Leo awakened as a man coming out of a terrifying nightmare.

Illa autem mortua, et potestas magica ejus in Leonis mentem abierat. Dissolutum enim erat carmen. Leo igitur expergefactus est quasi e terribili somnio.

Ἐκείνης δὲ τεθνηκυίας, καὶ ἡ αὐτῆς εἰς Λέοντος ψυχὴν μαγικὴ δύναμις ἐληλύθη. Κατελέλυτο γὰρ ἡ ἐπῳδή. Λέων οὖν ἠγέρθη ὡς ἐξ δεινοῦ ἐνυπνίου.

What happened?

She went into the pillar of flame once too often. That’s my theory!


Quid factum est?

Illa in columnam ardentem semel et sæpius introivit. Sic saltem sentio!

Τί πέπρακται;

Ἐκεινὴ ἅπαξ καὶ πλεονάκις εἰσῆλθεν εἰς τὴν φλεγομένην κίονα. Οὕτω γε τὴν γνώμην ἔχω.

I warned her, but She would not listen. The human body can stand just so much… even from the flame of life! This time, under the tension of the ordeal, She cracked and withered!

Dicebam jamdudum ego, Illa autem non audiebat. Corpus enim humanum tantum sustinet et flammam vitæ. Nunc quidem Illla tam conturbata erat ut concrepens siccata sit.

Ἔλεγον μὲν ἐγὼ πάλαι, Ἐκείνη δ' οὐκ ἤκουεν. Τὸ γὰρ ἀνθρώπινον σῶμα τοσοῦτον ὑπομένει καὶ τὴν φλόγα ζωῆς. Τό γε νῦν Ἐκείνη οὕτως συνετεταράχει ὥστε ψοφοῦσα αὐανθῆναι.

Let’s get out of this mad place!

We can’t go back the way we came. When her people learn of the death of She, they will murder us!


Abeamus istinc!

Non possumus qua venimus redire. Cum enim populus ejus audiverit de Illius morte, necabunt nos.

Ἀπίωμεν ἐντεῦθεν.

Οὐκ ἔξεστιν ἡμῖν ᾗ ἐληλύθαμεν ἐπανελθεῖν. Ὅταν γὰρ ὁ λαὸς αὐτῆς ἀκούσῃ τοῦ Ἐκείνης θανάτου, ἀποκτενοῦσιν ἡμᾶς.

There is a way to safety! Come!

That river will carry you to the sea. the rest is up to you!

Why do you do this for us?


Est via in salutem. Venite!

Fluvius ille deducet vos in mare. Ceterum autem vestrum est.

Quidnam agis pro nobis?

Ἔστιν ὁδὸς εἰς σωτηρίαν. Δεῦτε.

Ἐκεῖνος μὲν ὁ ποταμὸς κατάξει ὑμᾶς εἰς τὴν θάλασσαν. Τὸ δὲ λοιπὸν ὑμέτερόν ἐστιν.

Τί ποτε ποιεῖς ὑπὲρ ἡμῶν;
ImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 46


Honor among men is more priceless than gold or even life that lasts for ever!

Fides inter homines desiderabilis super aurum vel etiam vitam æternam!

Πίστις ἐν ἀνθρώποις ἐπιθυμητὴ ὑπὲρ χρυσίον ἢ καὶ ζωὴν αἰώνιον.

She had no honor. While she lived, I obeyed. She was my queen. Now I am free to repay favor when Holly saved my life in swamp! I will lead you to the river!

Illa autem perfida erat. Obœdiebam vero Illi viventi. Erat enim regina mea. Nunc autem nihil me prohibet quin reddam gratiam Ilici, qui salvam animam meam fecit in palude. Deducam vos ad fluvium.

Ἐκείνη δ' ἄπιστος ἦν. Ἐπειθόμην δὴ Ἐκείνῃ ζώσῃ. Βασίλισσά μου γὰρ ἦν. Νῦν δ' οὐδὲν κωλύει με ἀπὸ τοῦ ἀνταποδοῦναι χάριν Πρίνῳ σώσαντι ψυχήν μου ἐν τῷ ἕλει. Κατάξω ὑμᾶς πρὸς τὸν ποταμόν.

But how do we get there?

A secret way. Follow me.


Sed vero qua illuc perveniemus?

Via secreta. Sequimini me.

Ἀλλὰ μὴν πῇ ἐκεῖσε ἀφιξόμεθα;

Ὁδῷ ἀπορρήτῳ. Ἀκολουθεῖτε μοι.

Farewell, evil queen. Only death could break your spell over me. I am free. My family, my father, and I sleep well, She who lived for ever!

Ave, o mala regina! Solum mors potuit dissolvere carmen tuum super me. Nunc ergo liber sum. Et familia mea et pater et ego suaviter quiescimus, o Illa quæ in æternum vixit!

Εὐψύχει, ὦ πονηρὰ βασίλισσα. Μόνον γὰρ ὁ θάνατος οἷος τ' ἦν καταλῦσαι τήν σου ὑπὲρ ἐμοῦ ἐπῳδήν. Νῦν οὖν ἐλεύθερός εἰμί. Ὅ τε οἶκός μου ὅ τε πατὴρ κἀγὼ ἡδέως ἀναπαυόμεθα, ὦ Ἐκείνη ἡ εἰς αἰῶνα βιώσασα.
ImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »

Image 47 and last


Billali led us to the river and we made our way to the sea and home to England, where Leo and I live peacefully and happily, or so it seems. Revenge never did bring happiness to men.

Postea, cum Villaticus nos ad fluvium deduxisset, iter fecimus ad mare domumque in Angliam, ubi ego et Leo fortunate beateque vivimus, vel sic videtur. Numquam enim ultio homines beatos effecit.

Εἶτα δέ, Βιλλαρικοῦ ἡμᾶς ἐπὶ τὸν ποταμὸν καταγαγόντος, ἐπορεύθημεν ἐπὶ τήν τε θάλασσαν καὶ οἴκαδε εἰς τὴν Ἀγγλίαν, ὅπου ἐγὼ καὶ Λέων εὐδαίμονες καὶ μακάριοι βιοῦμεν, ἢ οὕτω γε δοκεῖ. Οὐ γὰρ ἡ τιμωρία οὐδέποτε ἐποίησε τοὺς ἀνθρώπους εὐδαίμονας.

When the flames roar high, there are times when Leo seems very far away from this world we live in. Sometimes as far away as the land of Kor.

Quando autem flamma flagrat, Leo aliquando videtur longe distare ab hoc ipso hominum mundo. Aliquando terra Cori tenus.

Ὅταν δὲ ἡ φλὸξ ἐκκάηται, Λέων ἐνίοτε μὲν δοκεῖ μακρὰν ἀπέχειν ἀπὸ τοῦ ἐνθάδε τόπου τοῦ τῶν ἀνθρώπων. Ἐνίοτε δ’ εἰς τὴν γῆν Κόρου.

It makes me uneasy. Somehow, the spirit of the beautiful but evil She seems to be with us even in death.

Quod me angit. Quodam enim modo anima Illius pulchræ sed malæ nobiscum etiam in morte manere videtur.

Ὅπερ λυπεῖ με. Τρόπον γάρ τινα ἡ ψυχὴ Ἐκείνης τῆς καλῆς ἀλλὰ πονηρᾶς δοκεῖ μεθ' ἡμῶν καὶ ἐν τῷ θανάτῳ μένειν.
ImageImage

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5101
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: She

Post by bedwere »


Post Reply