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If you've got leaving on your mind (or, Patsy Cline greeked)

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If you've got leaving on your mind (or, Patsy Cline greeked)

Postby annis » Sat Jul 12, 2008 1:02 am

William S. Annis — http://www.aoidoi.org/http://www.scholiastae.org/
τίς πατέρ' αἰνήσει εἰ μὴ κακοδαίμονες υἱοί;
annis
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Postby Kasper » Tue Jul 15, 2008 2:18 am

Very nice Will, even despite the (poetic) liberty taken as to the dreams that might have been.

I've drafted a latin version, also using the same meter. the third verse uses the meter of Mr Cho Dim for variety.

There are a number of weaknesses, but the most glaring is scilicet the line 'noli huc reliquere me etiam alucinantem ita adhinc'. To be perfectly honest, 'ita adhinc' is mere filler, putty, but well... it's the best i could come up with!

i'm not too sure about ending a line with a single syllable word either, and of course 'novus' doesn't really end with a long syllable. i've still used it as such because it's at the end of the line. I note you did the same.


si discedere destines
nunc narra mihi, finias
etiam me noce, finias
si discedere destines

sive in corde amor est novus
nunc narra mihi, finias
iamiam me noce, finias
sive in corde amor est novus

noli huc relinquere me
etiam alucinantem ita adhinc
nuncque me noce, finias
ut amare conperiam

sive in corde amor est novus
nunc narra mihi, finias
iamiam me noce, finias
sive in corde amor est novus

iamiam me noce, finias
sive in corde amor est novus
“Cum ego verbo utar,” Humpty Dumpty dixit voce contempta, “indicat illud quod optem – nec plus nec minus.”
“Est tamen rogatio” dixit Alice, “an efficere verba tot res indicare possis.”
“Rogatio est, “Humpty Dumpty responsit, “quae fiat magister – id cunctum est.”
Kasper
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Postby annis » Tue Jul 15, 2008 10:02 pm

Kasper wrote:Very nice Will, even despite the (poetic) liberty taken as to the dreams that might have been.


It's not clear to me that the ancient Greeks had the same psychology of dreams that motivated that lyric. Also, it would have blown my neat 4-line glyconics.

I've drafted a latin version, also using the same meter.


What's Latin for "yay!"?

i'm not too sure about ending a line with a single syllable word either,


Horace will be the poet to check for that, though I suppose Catullus uses his fair share of aeolic meters, too.

and of course 'novus' doesn't really end with a long syllable. i've still used it as such because it's at the end of the line. I note you did the same.


If the lines were to be taken in synaphaea I would have indented differently. I used the glyconics by the line, so the final syllable of the line is indifferent. I'm pretty sure that applies to both Greek and Latin verse.

So. A small Latin lesson for Wm...

nunc narra mihi, finias
etiam me noce, finias


My dictionaries make me suspicious about the acc. here with noceo. Dat. might be better.

And the entire etiam... line leaves me in doubt about my Latin scanning abilities. Isn't it nocē?

That's probably enough of me Latinating for just now. :)
William S. Annis — http://www.aoidoi.org/http://www.scholiastae.org/
τίς πατέρ' αἰνήσει εἰ μὴ κακοδαίμονες υἱοί;
annis
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Posts: 3397
Joined: Fri Jan 03, 2003 4:55 pm
Location: Madison, WI, USA

Postby Kasper » Tue Jul 15, 2008 11:13 pm

annis wrote:
i'm not too sure about ending a line with a single syllable word either,


Horace will be the poet to check for that, though I suppose Catullus uses his fair share of aeolic meters, too.


Yeah well, 4 more months of law school and the world will reopen to me again, and allow me some time to actually read something other than case law.


annis wrote: synaphaea


pardon?


annis wrote:
nunc narra mihi, finias
etiam me noce, finias


My dictionaries make me suspicious about the acc. here with noceo. Dat. might be better.

And the entire etiam... line leaves me in doubt about my Latin scanning abilities. Isn't it nocē?


Indeed you are right on all counts. I will amend to: "nunc/iam noce mihi, finias"
“Cum ego verbo utar,” Humpty Dumpty dixit voce contempta, “indicat illud quod optem – nec plus nec minus.”
“Est tamen rogatio” dixit Alice, “an efficere verba tot res indicare possis.”
“Rogatio est, “Humpty Dumpty responsit, “quae fiat magister – id cunctum est.”
Kasper
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Posts: 799
Joined: Wed Nov 05, 2003 3:01 am
Location: Melbourne

Postby cb » Wed Jul 16, 2008 6:54 am

cb
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Postby cb » Wed Jul 16, 2008 12:37 pm

hey will, noticed also in your signature that you have aspirated the indefinite neut acc pl as a pronoun (ἄττα) rather than as a relative (ἅττα), cheers :)
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Postby annis » Wed Jul 16, 2008 9:24 pm

William S. Annis — http://www.aoidoi.org/http://www.scholiastae.org/
τίς πατέρ' αἰνήσει εἰ μὴ κακοδαίμονες υἱοί;
annis
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Posts: 3397
Joined: Fri Jan 03, 2003 4:55 pm
Location: Madison, WI, USA

Postby annis » Wed Jul 16, 2008 9:29 pm

William S. Annis — http://www.aoidoi.org/http://www.scholiastae.org/
τίς πατέρ' αἰνήσει εἰ μὴ κακοδαίμονες υἱοί;
annis
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Posts: 3397
Joined: Fri Jan 03, 2003 4:55 pm
Location: Madison, WI, USA

Postby annis » Wed Jul 16, 2008 11:41 pm

William S. Annis — http://www.aoidoi.org/http://www.scholiastae.org/
τίς πατέρ' αἰνήσει εἰ μὴ κακοδαίμονες υἱοί;
annis
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Posts: 3397
Joined: Fri Jan 03, 2003 4:55 pm
Location: Madison, WI, USA

Postby annis » Thu Jul 24, 2008 4:23 pm

William S. Annis — http://www.aoidoi.org/http://www.scholiastae.org/
τίς πατέρ' αἰνήσει εἰ μὴ κακοδαίμονες υἱοί;
annis
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Posts: 3397
Joined: Fri Jan 03, 2003 4:55 pm
Location: Madison, WI, USA


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