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Help with poetry

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Help with poetry

Postby nathan92 » Sat Sep 11, 2010 4:09 pm

Hello :) I wrote a haiku in Latin for my girlfriend, and would really appreciate it if someone could have a look at it and tell me if there are any improvements or corrections I could make. Thanks !

I wanted to say

I am forever yours
and you make me complete
my light, I love you

and I translated it as

semper tuus ero
et me perfectum facis
lucem meus, amo

Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks again :)
nathan92
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